Black male, about 6’3, (last seen driving a european car)
As our first post, we just wanted to make a public service announcement. This is a very serious case and we just wanted to bring this serious case to everyone’s attention. Mainly innocent females.
Description: This dog wears a shirt and tie sometimes a tired ass black t-shirt. It depends on if he picks up the dry cleaning or not.
Last Seen: For now I believe his whereabouts are limited to the Washington DC metro area (NOVA, DC, MD) but I have heard that he travels a lot to Philadelphia, Charlotte and Raleigh NC.
The Case: Since he is supposedly “fixed” he is probably shooting blanks all around town. But still beware STDs are out there. Now let’s get to the heart of this search because I am sure his owners would really like him to be returned so he can be put down humanely. (maybe we should let Chipotle handle him). Sorry off topic…. What makes him more of a poodle instead of a just some rabid mutt is his desire to throw his money around and “take care” of his lady of the moment. He offers to pay your rent, get your car fixed (hell, he offered to buy Kitten a new car), take you on tropical vacations……he even wants you to meet the parents and family or perhaps move into his house (such a nice fella).
You are all probably thinking, “What a catch!” I mean, it certainly sounds like a puppy like that should be housebroken, or at least halfway trained. SURE…..well only if he was saying this to one person. He seems to like to share this with numerous women in his office. HIS OFFICE!!Luckily none of these women ever talked to each other (such a smart little bastard). That is, until one day two of the targets became friends. The sick puppy talked a little smack about one, notes got compared and now we are here.
This is a warning to all unsuspecting women on the sick bastard. More details to come…………..
